Let’s All Tread Gently Around the Delicate Republican Snowflakes

When did the Republican party become the party of the meek and victimized?  Aren’t they the party of personal responsibility?  The ones that accuse other people of being “soft”? Aren’t conservatives the ones that tell us to “pick yourself up by your boot straps”?  The ones that mock things like diversity, mom jeans, homos, and youth sports leagues where everybody gets a trophy?  Aren’t they, you know, the tough guys?

Now it seems like all they can do is cry and throw tantrums and claim “it’s not fair.”  And this is at a time when they control all three branches of government!

Seems like the party of the Gipper needs to grow a pair.

First, poor little rich kid Bret Kavanaugh cried like (can we say it?) a little girl when he was faced with even the slightest bit of resistance to his apparent entitlement to a Supreme Court seat.  Whatever happened to the Republicans’ notion of not blaming others for your own predicament? I guess that only applies to welfare moms and pregnant teenagers.

During Kavanaugh’s hearing, southern “gentleman,” Lindsay Graham (I bet Tobin and Squi mock him for having a girl’s name) was such a delicate little flower that he apparently suffered a massive attack of the vapors, causing his voice to tremble just by being confronted with the prospect of doing his job.

The right wing spin machine is also running full speed claiming poor Judge K is being “attacked” simply because people are reporting on his antics and high school rapiness hijinks.  I guess I’ve forgotten all the times Kavanaugh was too busy not having sex to tell his boss Ken Starr to stop “attacking” Bill Clinton by divulging truths about Clinton’s transgressions.

These weak-kneed cowards have a leader that can’t open his mouth without mocking someone, whether it be a disabled reporter, a sexual assault victim, or a war hero.  Yet they’re quick to cry foul when their feelings are hurt.  Christ. Man-up, you pussies! Are they pussies? I don’t know.  People are saying…

And they can’t even fight their own battles. At the side-show that they ran under the guise of a Senate hearing, they had to hire a woman do their dirty work.

Now comes Rand Paul’s wife to take on that mean Cory Booker, because….well, I guess because Rand can talk big but cowers when confronted by a black man?



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This Shit Has Got to Stop!

Folks, I’m not naive.  I know racism isn’t going to be eradicated overnight.  But, seriously, WTF?!

It’s one thing to feel threatened by, and not embrace, people that aren’t like you (not that it’s acceptable, but I understand it – from a sociological perspective). But it’s entirely incomprehensible to act is if you’ve never SEEN a person of color before, or that they aren’t allowed to mow a lawn, sleep in a dorm, knock on a door, or frigging have lunch!

There’s no question that the cretin in the White House has emboldened these people, but what is their end game? Yeah, it’s fun to harass people you don’t like, but I can’t imagine the cops are pleased with you when they have to show up and deal with this nonsense.

If I can paint in massively broad strokes, I suspect at least some of these people sport “Blue Lives Matter” stickers on their pick up trucks.  But if you really support law enforcement (instead of just claiming you do – because it’s code for “I don’t mind that cops shoot blacks”), stop wasting their time.  Stop pulling perfectly good cops away from situations where they may need to provide assistance to someone in need – including one of their own!

And if you you genuinely feel threatened by a middle schooler mowing lawns or someone minding her own business, or taking a nap, you are definitely the biggest pussy that ever lived.

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Guns don’t kill people, 4-year olds kill people

Where’s the good 4-year old with gun when you need him?





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They’re Called “Smart” Phones But Any Imbecile Can Own One

I can’t believe this even needs to be said, but for the love of everything good and decent, when you a see stranger in distress, put down the effing phone and go help!

Here’s a story guaranteed to make your blood boil.  Its’ horrible. It’s atrocious. It wouldn’t have happened in an alternate reality where anyone other than Trump is President. But even in this corrosively toxic environment that he has created, you’d think there would be a limit to how far people would go. Who beats up a frail 91 year-old?!

And yet as troubling as this account is, I’m reserving my ire for the bystander. Witness this quote: “When I tried to videotape her with my cell phone, she threw that same concrete block, tried to hit my car.”

When you tried to videotape her?!  Jesus friggin Christ.  What was your next comment, “ultimately, I’d like to direct”?

I’m sure it’s hard to throw yourself into the fray and risk your own bodily harm. And given the use of the term “videotape”, I’ll assume this was no spring chicken. But how about shouting at the assailant to stop? Or calling police?  Or trying to get other bystanders to help you?  In fairness, we don’t necessarily know that this woman didn’t do any of those things.  But if the internet is any indication, she likely didn’t.

Yes, technology is here to help us. Yes, it’s good that we can capture video evidence that helps  prosecute bad people. But folks, there’s only one Zapruder film. You’re not the next Ken Burns.

Next time get your 15 minutes of fame by doing something like this guy.

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Boo Friggin’ Hoo

Poor Sarah Huckabee Sanders.  Sounds like she is persona non grata at the Red Hen in Lexington, Virginia.

So, what can we learn from this –  other than that the owner of the Red Hen is my new hero?  Well, for starters, we know that Sanders is every bit the thin-skinned hypocrite that her boss is.

Witness this tweet from the POTUS’s spokeswoman …communications directormouth piece chief lying sack of shit:

Her actions say far more about her than about me. I always do my best to treat people, including those I disagree with, respectfully and will continue to do so.

Let’s break this down in two pieces.

First, anyone that has ever seen a White House press briefing knows that the second part is pure horse crap. The disdain with which Sanders and rest of the Trump cadre treat not just those with different views, but even those with the temerity to ask the administration to defend their own positions, is on display daily. The overt disingenuousness here is astounding. Like all bullies, Sanders has no problem attacking others, but yet quickly plays the victim when the slings are aimed her way.

Second, it really doesn’t say more about the owner than Sanders.  What it says about the owner is: at worst she’s petty.  At best she has balls.  Contrary to most business owners who never pick sides lest it affect their bottom line, this woman felt principled enough to take action.

Conversely, what it says about Sanders is that she’s ignorant and tone deaf to real America. She’s not nearly as politically astute as she thinks she is if she doesn’t understand that  good, decent people everywhere are outraged by things like state-sponsored separation of parents and children. Sanders is so busy placating Trump who is so busy placating his base that she seems to have lost all moral fiber, assuming she had any to begin with.

Facing a backlash from people of conscience shouldn’t be a surprise to Huckleberry Sanders.  She’s sold her soul to Donald Trump. She trades in dishonesty and habitually  insults the very notion of democracy and a free press. It should come as no epiphany that her betrayal of decency evokes a strong reaction from people with still-beating hearts.

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This Is Why Nobody Likes You Hillary

For Boston sports fans, two really horrible things happened in 1986.

Most everyone recalls the baseball that rolled through Bill Buckner’s legs in October. But in June, just a couple days after the NBA draft, which itself was just a couple days after another Celtics championship, their first round pick Len Bias died of a cocaine overdose.

Somehow or another the great Celtics GM Red Auerbach always managed to bilk some team in a trade.  Despite being the best team in the league, the Cetics, already stacked with talent, had the second pick in the entire draft.  They used that pick on Bias, a 6′ 9″ forward from the University of Maryland.

Because that ’86 Championship was the last the Celtics would see for a long while, many Boston fans contended that if only they had Len Bias there would have been a few more. The refrain seemed to last forever, and is reminiscent of the far-right chant of “thanks Obama” as an explanation for everything from the price of Budweiser to the heartbreak of psoriasis.

No matter that the Bulls ended up with Jordan and Pippen, or that the bad boys from Detroit had a rebounding machine in Dennis Rodman and a hall of fame point guard in Isiah Thomas, or that Houston had Olajuwon and San Antonio had the twin towers of Duncan and Robinson.  Nope. If the Celtics only only had Len Bias surely they would have bested all of the above.  No matter that Larry Bird’s back was falling apart and Bill Walton’s career was essentially over.  Nope, all they needed was Len Bias.

The “what if they had Len Bias” lament became so prominent that it became a standard punchline even decades later – well after what would have been Bias’s inevitable retirement.

And so class, that brings us to today’s topic.  James Comey is Hillary Clinton’s Len Bias.

Hillary is the Democrat’s version of the old white guy in his red MAGA t-shirt at a Trump rally holding a sign with misspelled words and thinking that Obama is responsible for sending his job to Mexico, or China, or one of those countries where they let little girls get married.  Never mind that he lost his job ’cause his own state never spent enough money on book learnin; and that (if his state is Mississippi) his own daughter can get married at 15. Introspection doesn’t seem to be her strong suit.

Regardless how many flaws Hillary has, and regardless how many miscalculations and underestimations her campaign made, she and her apostles will go the their graves blaming only Jim Comey.

Sure, Russia tampered in the election. Sure, Bernie Sanders constantly polled better against Trump. Sure, Hillary never visited Wisconsin. Sure, she was saddled with both Obama’s and Bill’s baggage. Sure, she lacks charisma and came across as a shrill shrew. Sure, there was a lot of latent (and blatant) sexism involved. And sure, the electoral college might have outlived its useful shelf-life. But, by God, had it not been for Jim Comey she would have won.

James Comey: at 6’8″ he’s an inch shorter than Len Bias, but as an urban legend he stands just as tall.


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Fuck You Marco Rubio

Another school shooting. Another dozen and half innocent people dead.

The disingenuous bleat of the NRA toadies all sending thoughts and prayers. Fuck your  thoughts and prayers. Fuck your hand wringing.  Fuck you Congress – don’t ask me to shed a tear when someone shoots your kids.

And Fuck You Marco Rubio. You’re a piece of shit to suggest that no law could stop these mass murders. It’s likely the only thing that will.

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